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The Difficult Conversations
There are a few people out there that don’t have a problem with confrontation but for most of us, if we just think about it, our stomachs do flip flops. When the time comes for the conversation we usually just start talking, our point is not clear ... nor is what we desire from the outcome. When we do this it is usually met with confusion and people get defensive. A lot of times someone will get “triggered” ... then you will get more than you bargained for. The conversation will go in a direction that has nothing to do with what you need. This is why most people avoid difficult conversations. What starts out with a good intention turns not so good. Before I have this type of conversation I like to get clear on the reason for having it. I have my side of the conversation with myself so I can be sure that what I need to ask or say is coming from a true place. If your “talks” generally go in a direction that is not satisfying for either party you can be sure you both have been triggered! The more this happens the more closed down you become. The next thing you know you're frustrated, angry and resentful. Becoming aware of your triggers, healing them and learning compassionate communication can make a huge difference in your life. There isn’t anybody that wouldn’t benefit from these two things.
Sincerely, Lori Barnett, HHP |
No one likes to have them -- whether you’re a boss that needs to reprimand an employee, a parent that needs to have a talk with a child, or a spouse that needs to share a feeling or a need.